So I am wide awake this morning too early...
I am watching Sunday morning on CBS.
There is a interesting piece on what would happen if you had one more chance to say the things that you never said. Those moments when you can get things out on paper, or in words, to relieve the emotion of regret off of your chest and heart. So powerful
Those missed opportunities when you could have said something or done something tend to leave innumerable tears at your heart and always lurk in the back of your mind. It is retained there so much longer than those fleeting moments.
Always remember that final conversation with people. Make sure that you are able to say the words that you need to to complete that final moment with each other. Say "I love you" before you leave each morning. Offer help to those who clearly need it. Whether it is telling them you love them or saying or doing something more .
The events of this passed week have left and will leave an unmeasurable tear and stain in American history. Boston and the marathon will always be on our minds and hearts. West, Texas is emblazoned on our brains and all that those who work to keep us safe endure. Its hose moments when you hear that volunteer firemen head down to the site, sometimes never to be seen again. Those are the chances one takes in the line of work they feel passionate to pursue.
But great regret follows if you never get the chance to say those words...
I know that I will live with regret of never reaching out to Michael Nahas. He seemed like a tender soul, a new face on our campus and a teacher of Art and Science. Our paths never crossed as we were in very different parts of the building. The only time we ever saw each other was in the parking lot on some chilly mornings. He always had a smile on his face and seemed like a soft, gentle being and someone I had hoped to be able to get to know as the years rolled on. It was only after he took his own life on Pinnacle Mountain that you realize those that you follow in your every day life may be struggling with darkness, may struggle to put on their mask for the day and make everyone seem like they are okay. He left behind a wife, a 13 year old son, and many many students who absolutely adored him. It is truly sad.
What I struggle with is "what ifs". What if we had all seen the warning signs. What if we had reached out in those initial faculty meetings and just said hi. Gotten passed the awkwardness of not knowing new faces. Reaching out and getting to know folks...never knowing what they might be going through. Maybe things would be different.
You just don't know...
So take the time. Make sure you leave as many conversations as you can with exactly how you feel...be honest. Be forthright. Be truthful. Be sure you do not live your life with these regrets and make each moment count.
