So many touching moments from La Cage Aux Folles...

So many memorable, beautiful. poetic, heart touching moments during the run of this amazing production.

I have seen many new faces...some many times, coming to see this show more than just once.

I have been moved by the powerful stories audience members so freely share with me. And for this I am eternally grateful.

The audience member who came to me with tears in her eyes and just hugged me and whispered, "Thank you"

The mentor who came and just hugged me and said "I am so proud of you."

The audience members who have thanked me for the roller coaster of emotions.

Friends who have driven MILES to get here to show their love and support and to attend this show...some from Kansas City, some coming from Omaha, some as close as Monticello...all driving in to see the show and offer their hugs. SO MOVING on my heart and just plain brings tears to my eyes...SO GRATEFUL!!!

The flowers. The thank you notes. The kindness extended to our entire cast. The camaraderie I have felt from everyone in this amazing cast...we feel how important this experience truly is.

I have been deeply moved by the tears in people's eyes as they greet me in the lobby for a hug, a hand shake, or a pat on the shoulder.

I feel the importance of this moment.

I love what this show continues to say every time a theatre is BRAVE enough to put it on its boards...

I deeply connect with Zaza/ Albin. I feel her pain when her child says what he says. I feel the power she has when she takes the stage and tries to provide just a few moments of laughter and smiles to her audience. I feel very deeply every word of the song "I AM WHAT I AM" because this song encapsulates the ENTIRE coming out process for me and for many others...I don't think that I have ever truly connected to a character the way I connect to this one and probably won't have that same connection in the future possibly...I may be wrong. This is why this role has been on the bucket list ever since I saw it so many years ago on the Omaha Community Playhouse's stage.

I believe so deeply in the La Cage Aux Folles message...it is not one person who can raise a child...it takes dedication, it takes a team, and it takes a village. This couple is very loving and love comes in many forms. This couple has raised a wonderful son together over their 20 years. This couple has done right by their child every time...and it doesn't matter whether this couple is a man and a woman, a woman and a woman, or two men. The importance lies in the fact that child feels loved, feels nurtured, and feels supported.

Love is Love is Love is Love is LOVE.

In a world of hatred and anger and ridicule...what the world needs to see is love in the face of hatred. Love standing up to the ridicule and harsh words.

Love taking a step forward every time and showing people how to lead their lives.

ZaZa does this with grace, with strength, and with laughter and tears.

Today we call it "history" and wrap up this production and put it in the books...

It will definitely no be one quickly forgotten by those involved...

And I am so darn grateful for this opportunity and experience.

How to nourish your soul...

I think we are all passionate about our lives...

I just think that sometimes we get lost in the rat race...or the high pitched hums of life and forget to chart our path.

I am at a crossroads.

I can feel it.

I can see it ahead of me and it scares the crap out of me. But it also excited me.

I am about to take another leap and have been searching for the last 3 years for what that next step is because the one I had taken was too bumpy for me. I now know that God had taken me down this path to strengthen me, to teach me great lessons on interpersonal communication, and to help me to grow professionally and personally. I look back on the past 7 years with great pride, with sadness, with a sense of failure, with a sense of stronger focus and now can see that this was all preparing me to look ahead and step forward and raise my hand to say, "What's next?"

I am crossing bucket list events off my never ending list but am at a point where I truly do not know what "NEXT" looks like for acting roles...
I need to constantly remind myself to nourish my soul and to be true to my heart and find what touches me emotionally and deeply. And to TAKE THE TIME TO be kinder to ME. Kinder to those I hold dear to me. And in turn be kinder to those around me I may not already know.

I think this is important.

In today's world...

This is a HARD ONE FOLKS!!!
I think it is so difficult to remain positive in a political season that has been so hateful and nasty and vengeful. I can only imagine what our neighbors must think.I think it is going to be a difficult journey to bounce back from this one and I just don't think we are going to be in a good place regardless of who takes the top spot.

On a personal note: it is difficult to remember this when you have been beaten down, when you have been disrespected for so long, when you have not felt supported for so long, when you have felt out on your own for so long on a professional level, on a creative level, on any level actually. Change is a must in those particular times. A shift must happen both figuratively and permanently.

I am just so thankful for sounding boards, for love and support from loved ones, for friends and family, and for times of meditation to remember and reconnect to this thought process. It is not always going to be easy. It is not always going to be smooth. It is not always going to be the "BEST life moments" but you have got to face each day with softer eyes, with a calmer heart, or you will be consumed. And consistently remind your head and heart to do so...

Many years ago, I allowed myself to be overwhelmed with anger, with sadness, with fear and allowed it to consume my life. I had felt wronged. I had felt that my decision was the best decision and that I could direct everyone around me to believe my way was the best way or just plain cut you out of my life. The result? My health dwindled, my sleep went away, I had to take more Melatonin to get to sleep, everything in my life was not going as it should and my body was telling me so.

Thank God for counseling and for a redirection. I was told that I could only direct one person's life and that was my own. Why would you try to direct someone else's life...that was just plain tiring. It was definitely a reshift in thought. I cannot live another person's life for them. I have to just live my own personal experience and do it with a sense of fullness and integrity and sincerity. Let others live their lives the way they envision and move forward.

Today, and always, I pray for softer eyes. I pray for a softer heart. I pray for a redirected mind and am thankful for the day I am presented with. A new opportunity to make a difference. A new day to begin a new adventure and a new journey.

Go about your day, fellow sojourners, with sweetness.

Can I get an AMEN?

This speech moved me to tears during the presentation of this year's Tonys.

So true.

So moving.

And if folks who continue to spew their hate would just stop and take a look at themselves in the mirror...I think they would be truly disgusted at what they see. How can you spew such vitriol at other people mistakenly justified in the name of God and Jesus, a man who preached "Love not Hate" and think that you are justified to do so, that you are justified because God taught you to do so...

I will continue to reach out to others in a mode of love and support.

Love is Love and cannot be killed...

Brilliance.

Man UP?

One thing my students will tell you what they know about Higdem is that he is not afraid to cry in front of his kids. I think in today's world, we are barraged with fear tactics, with so much anger, and so many young men forced to become "MEN" too soon and are TOLD what that definition should be, not letting them form their own opinion. I hate that young men are forced to be MEN and what that odd mentality actually means and is forcibly defined as. Men, in today's society, are forced into a SQUARE and are told...No emotion. No sign of weakness. Strength only and must become a strong leader. And that all of the opposites of these predecessors equals weakness and is assigned a strong connection with feminine qualities. WHY IS THAT ACCEPTED?

Young men today should take a strong page out of this saying above. And it is TRUTH. Some of the strongest male role models I have had in my life have cried in front of me, have had the willingness to allow themselves to reach out for help and it doesn't add up to WEAKNESS in my heart and my mind. It only makes them more endearing and loved and accessible. Every moment has lead to hugs only and not shuns.

We are seeing such a shift in the American mentality...or at least I think we are. We are seeing a President begin to cry a bit when speaking about the children shot in school shootings. We are seeing a woman break the glass ceiling to claim her right at the top job in this country. We are seeing a shift towards equality for all gender opportunities and it is extremely exciting. There are folks out there who would disagree and are purely going at this from their political party lines...but  I encourage them to just step back from their political ire and look at where we have come in the last 10 years. We are seeing such an exciting shift towards equality, towards the opportunity to "break down the doors" and everyone is now being provided the opportunity to own every minute and possibility ahead. It doesn't matter if you are male or female, black or white, gay or straight...it is coming from an aspect that we are all the same, by blood, by the fact that we are a strong member of this human race.

So I say stop encouraging men to "MAN UP" and just live their true calling. Follow their HEART. Follow their passion. And for God sake, if you feel moved to do so, a good cry can take the pressure off your heart when you hold it all in.

Carry on fellow sojourners...

A touching moment from LA Cage Aux Folles..

There have been so many touching moments from this life-changing experience. I am so moved by each and every one of them. I am going to document a few of them over the next few days on here so that I can share with each of you and also to remember. I will keep them anonymous to protect the folks who stepped out of their comfort zone to share something very personal with me, but moved me so deeply.

The first experience came from someone I had just met but so enjoyed meeting during our rehearsal process. They met me at my dressing room door immediately following a performance one evening and asked if they could talk to me for a bit.

They began to tell me that they had come out to their parents in the last few years and that it had not gone very well. This statement always jars me a bit, as my coming out process, though not smooth, was much smoother than others and I did not live in the Bible Belt of Conservative America when I did come out. They mentioned their parents had struggled and continued to struggle with the announcement and had not been a very positive experience. They went on to tell me that the parents were in the audience that particular evening and they were so nervous about them being there. Not shocked about that as I would be too!! YIKES!!!

They went on to say that their parents had been so moved, not only by my performance, but just with the character of Albin/Zaza on a deeper level. To see what the character had to struggle with and push through in a world of hate and lack of understanding...the character was so motherly and nurturing and had sacrificed so much for their son...they then went on to say that their mother was in tears and just really was so moved by the entire production. Jokingly, I said that they would be having wonderful conversations that evening and I hope they indeed have.

This is why I firmly believe in the POWER and MAGNITUDE of theater and how it can reach out and tug at the heart strings of people. Holding a mirror up to their eyes and say, "Hey this is what has happened. This is what you have done. This is where you have taken me. What are we going to do about this?" SO POWERFUL!

I believe in the POWER of theater as an entertaining tool to educate people and to show them new ideas and that folks, is the best ever!!!

I count this entire experience as such a blessing that I have had the opportunity of being a part of. This role is so powerful and immense and truly showcases something that was poignant in 1983 and is still VERY IMPORTANT today. The show truly reaches folks on many levels...you can be laughing at one moment and in tears the next. I am so thankful for this experience in my career and in my life.

Feeling so grateful and kinda teary today...

A little jovial moment...

We have all been there. those roles that you look back and just shake your head...but we all have them...its called "the ropes"...

I have been a walking Egg character to promote seat belt awareness..BUB...Buckle UP Bismarck.
I have been a singing lettuce head in a salad bar...

Oh the stories one can tell...

I love this concept. It provides simplicity and yet still reaches deep and thought-provoking moments to reconnect. So here goes...with "words that touch my soul"

LOVE
FERVENTLY
FAMILY
FRIENDSHIP
DEDICATION
TRUTH
HONESTY
HUMBLENESS
PEACEFULLY
ARTISTRY
CREATIVITY
CONNECTIVITY
STRENGTH
POSITIVITY
ADVENTURES
FULLEST
TOUCH
HEART
GUT
SOFTNESS
GRAND
SOLITUDE
SUPPORTIVE
TOGETHER
MOVING
FORWARD
CUDDLES
MUSICAL

What words inspire your heart? These are only a few that come to my mind but I do know that there are plenty more.

The minute you lose track of wonder...

I always say that the minute you lose sight of your childlike wonder is the saddest moment of your life. You have have to approach each adventure with childlike eyes and adult process. But the excitement children have is how we should approach life folks.
There are so many things I wonder about and these thoughts have changed the older I get.

I wonder if the world will continue to be about fear and scare me enough to consider not bringing a child into it.
I wonder if the house will sell.
I wonder if cancer will one day be obliterated. It needs to be be.
I wonder if hatred will ever be something just considered " in the past".
I wonder what makes the sky so blue.
I wonder what is next?
I wonder where will be the next adventure.

I need to wander more and trust in the path.
I need to trust and open myself up more.
I need to be open more to possibility and teach more by example.
I need to be the vision that I see for myself and for my students.
I need to turn it over to God when things get to overwhleming.

I value my husband.
I value my family both near and far.
I value my friendships. I wish we all lived around the block.
I value my faith.
I hold love as the most important emotion on the planet and live each day by it.

Just some thoughts...
Carry on fellow sojourners.